Tuesday, December 22, 2009

I married my youngest daughter....

Saturday - Dec 19, 2009 I married my youngest daughter Kelsey. It was a small ceremony. And before all y'all think I wnet from redneck to hillbilly - I married my youngest daughter to a nice young man. Now Joey is from Louisiana, and there is a little bit of a rivalry between Texas and Louisiana. So this new merger of 2 different cultures ought to lead to some fun family gettogethers. Joey's parents Dave and Lisa are great folks as were his grandparents and we look forward to spending more time together.

I am not normally what you would call sensitive and emotional - but tears came out of my eyes. What's worse is everyone saw it - there goes my redneck points.

Anyway the wife and I are looking forward to a year with no weddings and no children's tuition to pay.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

A Poem

soemwhere a baby cries
he's hungry and cold
flies are in his eyes
who's to blame for the shape he's in?

Not me - I'm not my brothers' keeper

somewhere an old man dies
lying in a gutter full of whiskey and rye
who's to blame for the shape he's in?

Not me - I'm not my brothers' keeper

somewhere there's a man in prison
locked away - never seeing the sun
who's to blame for the shape he's in?

Not me - I'm not my brothers keeper

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Funeral Music

My friend Rachel of My Poor Husband fame -- recently wrote about what she wanted to be remembered for at her funeral. I have given thought to my funeral before and I have come up with some ideas ---
For music I want Big House by Audio Adrenaline played - after which I want kool-aid to be passed out and a toast drunk in remembrance. I think this would be great for a couple of reasons -- one I love Audio Adrenaline and I think my funeral should be a celebration --- also when They have finished singing come and go with me to my Father's house and are served kool-aid --- I can just imagine the hesitancy to drink the kool aid that will follow.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Cosmic Cowboy

This is a dramtic rendition of Barry McGuire's Cosmic Cowboy

Friday, September 18, 2009

Obama Care preparation

I went to the doctor with my wife yesterday. She scheduled a little outpatient procedure and the lady at the desk informed us that she still had a $200 deductible to meet. No problem. I said we need to get this taken care of before Obama care kicks in and we have to get it approved by some medical (death) panel.

This got me to thinking. What other things shoul I take care of before obamacare kicks in. I am 47 and a white male. So far I have no medical problems that I know of. I am not being treated for high cholesterol or high bl0od pressure or anything like that. But since I am a white male I was thinking about maybe scheduling some preemptive medical care while my insurance is still good.

Does anyone know of a doctor that would do a double bypass on a healthy 47 year old male? I don't need one yet but in the next 25-30 years I might so perhaps I sjhould get it done before I have to go before a medical panel and have it approved.

If not a bypass - could I just have the most popular areas stinted ahead of time?

Could I prepay for a bypass and have it preplanned like a preplanned funeral?

What about prostrate surgery could I get that scheduled before Christmas?

Can I go ahead and get about a 20 year supply of viagra for when I will need it in the future--- at least according to the commercials. I wouldn't want to need it and find that obamacare deemed it medically unnecessary.

These are the things I'm looking into, so that I can be ready when we socialize, nationalize obamize healthcare.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Monday, September 14, 2009

How Grey is our GA

I have been a fan of Christ Tomlin for many years. I took my youth group to the Texas Youth Evangelism Conference for years when it was in San Antonio. I remember visting with Chris in the hallway at the table where he sold his CD's. This was prior to metrosexual worship leader Chrsi Tomlin --- he had a normal haircut, wore wranglers and flannels shirts with a baseball cap --- This was Authentic Chris Tomlin - I call him that because that was the name of his self marketed cd.

I also took my youth group to Austin for the recording of his live cd after that marketing team got to him and moussed his hair and traded his wranglers and flannels for designer jeans and shirts with pretty designs on them. The music is stil great.

I do want to say that Chris has done nothing but get better and better.

I do now have to lodge a complaint. Leading worship I am always looking for new songs to sing congregationally and as a special on occasion. I am limited at my church to the use of cd's. So imagine my joy when Master Trax started making cd collections of accompaniment trax with more then one song on them. I bought the Chris Tomlin collection.

Now we have done How can I keep from Singing and Amazing Grace 2 great songs -- Undescribable is also on the cd - but we have kind of worn that one out.

This brings us to How Great is our God. I have been practicing it for several weeks but I can't bring myself to singing it. I keep hearing the recording version where Chris drops all the ending vowels. I know this because my wife cringes every time she hears it. The difference between me and my wife is that she grew up in choirs and I grew up in rock bands. So she notices these thing much more quickly then I.

The recorded version sound like the singer is saying How grey is our Ga sing with me How Grey is our Ga and all will see How grey how grey is our ga.

Since my wife has pointed it out to me I have been emphasizing the ending vowels and now I sound like some preppy opera singer faking rock. It is kind of like imaging Julie Andrews singing Janis Joplin --- it is justed too mixed a metaphor. Kind of like wearing overalls with a tie.

Anyone else having this issue?


Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Guy's guide for when their pants hang too low.

I have noticed over the past few years some trend in the way young men wear their pants. I have decided that possibly they need a guide to know when their pants are hanging too low.

  1. No more then the waist band of boxers should be above the waistband of your pants. If you can see your boxers your pants are too low.
  2. If the inseam of your pants starts at your knees - your pants are too low.
  3. If your belt cuts the circulation off at your thighs - your pants are too low.
  4. If your short pants look like high water regular pants - your pants are too low.
  5. If you have to bend over to get something out of your pocket - your pants are too low.
  6. If you look like Dorf - your pants are too low

Please feel free to add your ways of knowing when your pants are too low

The Four Horsemen of Chunky's

I watched Man Vs Food on the travle network a couple of weeks ago. He was in Texas so the shows caught my attention. He took the BiG Texan challenge in Amarillo and ate the 72 oz steak. Then he profiled some places in San Antonio.

One of the challenges he met was the 4 Horsemen Burger at Chunky's. This is a burger with 4 kinds of peppers, habanero, serrano, jalapeno and the GHOST pepper.

I mentioned it at work and was soon challenged to try it myself.

I gave it my best shot --- It took me 5 minutes to completely eat the burger.

It took my stomach less then 3 minutes to give it back.

I was in serious pain - the pepper juice was in my eyes, my stomach and throat were in pain.

I went home and every once in a while the peppers would rotate to apoint in my stomach where it felt as if I had a burning coal trying to find a way out.

It was over 48 hours till I could eat again.

When my wife came home that night - she looked at me and instead of that love, compassion and sympathy one would expect - she stated that "you did it to yourself"

I did learn some valuable lessons
1> I ain't nowhere near 17 anymore.
2> There is a reason the famous last words of a redneck are " Hey guys watch this"

Saturday, August 8, 2009

What's next?

The nest is empty. Amy the oldest has graduated from college and was married in July. The youngest has moved to Louisiana and is getting married in December. What do I do next?

I have spent tha last 24 years raising kids and working to support them. I want to spend the next couple of decades impacting the world in a different way. So what to do? I am looking at teaching or working with child protective services. Any ideas?

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Barak Obama and innocent life

WASHINGTON – President Barack Obama is telling the National Prayer Breakfast that even though faith too often has been used "as a tool to divide us from one another," there is no religion in the world that is based on hatred.
Obama, in prepared remarks, said, "There is no God who condones taking the life of an innocent human being."

Now this is a great statement --- I just don't see how it can be reconciled with Obama's continued support of the taking of the most innocent life through abortion.

Friday, January 30, 2009

How then should we live?

This question came up in Bible study this week and I have been wrestling with it.
What is it about being a Christ follower that makes us different from our neighbors? It seems there must be more to being a follower of Christ than being a church goer. What concrete things should we be doing? How does beinga Christ follower change us? Paul says that we are new creatures - this implies an ontological change. A change in substance from one kind of being to another. Jesus called this being born again - being born of the Spirit. Again this implies a change at the core of our being. Then why don't our lives reflect this kind of radical change? Why are most of us that call ourselves Christ followers living lives that are not abundant and changed?

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Another poem

She took off her wig, her false teeth, her glass eye.

She thought it was strange, this look on my face.

I wanted to hug her, love her and squeeze her,

but she was scattered all over the place!

A Poem

Seasons are changin
Times movin on
Somedays it seems
life has passed me by,
So I have to go back where I feel at home
Up where my spirit can reach the sky

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Barak Obama and his plan to reduce abortion.

The President stated that he wanted to see abortions as a rare occurence. To that end he signed an executive order that allows federal funds to be used to pay for abortions. This redneck mind has trouble wrapping his pea brain around how this will make abortion rare - but if an Ivy league education and the hope of the free world says it will it must.

Now if this works for abortion will it work for other areas. I mean we all want drug use and alcoholism to be at a minimum ---- So how about federal funding for mary jane farmers and how about the Fed paying for happy hour at the local bar -- this should reduce drunkeness and drug abuse in a hurry.

For that matter --- why not try it on the war on terror - instead of bombing Osama with ordinance - lets give him a grant. we should be safer overnight.

My first blog entry.

It has been sugeested by friends that i try writing a blog. This blog will include rants. Rants that I am known for are full of sarcasm and satire. This doesn't always carry over well in writing, but I will attempt it. So if you would like to come along with me insert your tongue between the cheek and gum and let's ride